Friday, June 17, 2016

Kakolukiam - The Crisis in the World of Crows

The Crows’ Association in Karnataka’s capital city of Bengaluru had called for an urgent meeting to discuss various current issues. The issues included:
1. Scarcity of homes  (nests)  for the community due to cutting of trees – mainly by Bangalore Metro
2. Insult to their Master Shani Maharaj by Revanna son of Deve Gowda, former Prime Minister
3. Insult to one of their members by Siddaramaiah, the Chief Minister of Karnataka
The meeting takes place in Palace Grounds under the Chairmanship of Meghavarna  (refer Panchatantra).  It starts  with a prayer to Shani Maharaj.  The Chairman invites a senior crow named Kaka to come on stage and initiate the discussions. Kaka comes on stage.
Chairman:  Tell us Kaka. What do you want to say on the first item of the agenda?
Kaka: The City of Bengaluru was once upon a time known as the Garden city. But the rising population and real estate boom has virtually made it a concrete jungle. There is wanton destruction of trees denying us the place to build our nests.
Chairman:  Who is responsible for this? Can you name them?
(Before Kaka could say something, a middle-aged crow stands up and starts shouting that  Modi is responsible! )
Chairman: Who is he? Why he is blaming Modi? In what way Modi is responsible for what is happening in Bengaluru?
Kaka: His name is Kejri, Sir. He is in the habit of blaming the Prime Minister Modi for anything and everything, Sir!
Chairman: What is wrong with him?  What is that white thing he is wearing on his head?
Kaka: He appears to be a psycho, Sir. He calls the thing on his head as AAP CAP, Sir!
Chairman: Ask him to shut up. Let us proceed with the agenda.
Kaka: The real estate developers are partly responsible. But the main culprit is Bangalore Metro, Sir.
Kejri: Modi is responsible! Modi is responsible!
Chairman:  Will you kindly shut up? Let us proceed with the agenda.
Kaka: The Metro Phase-I has destroyed a number of trees especially in Lakshman Rao Park. It is planning to remove nearly 500 more trees in Phase-II.
(After deliberations, the meeting decides to go on a deputation to the Managing Director of Bangalore Metro Rail Corporation to request him to stop cutting trees anymore)
Chairman:  Let us come to the second item on the agenda now. Kaka can you brief the meeting on the subject?
Kaka: JD (S) leader and son of former Prime Minister Deve Gowda Revanna has called the eight rebel MLAs who voted Congress Candidate in the Rajya Sabha elections as Shanis and has said that the Shani Kata has now been transferred to Congress, Sir. This is an insult to our community who worship and carry Shani Maharaj - as his official Vahana, Sir.
Kejri: Modi is responsible! Modi is responsible!
Chairman: This is too much. Has he gone mad?
Kaka: My suggestion is to go on a deputation and meet HD Deve Gowda and tell him that his son  has hurt our feelings.
Chairman: You are right. I am told that he is a highly religious person. I am sure he would appreciate our position. Let us come to the last item on the agenda now.
Kaka: This is a very simple and straight case, Sir. One of our beloved members was taking a short rest on the official car of the Chief Minister Siddaramaiah, Sir.
Chairman: That is very normal. What went wrong then?
Kejri: Modi is responsible! Modi is responsible!
Chairman: Can somebody make him shut up his mouth? I am getting mad now!  Please go ahead Kaka.
Kaka: You may not believe this, Sir. The CM, an atheist,  who is known to be against  superstitions and who is trying to bring a law against superstitions is said to have consulted astrologers, Sir!
Chairman: Please continue.
Kejri: Modi is responsible! Modi is responsible!
Kaka: My patience is also running out.
Chairman: Never mind.  Please continue.
Kaka: The astrologers told the CM that it was a bad omen and advised him to go for a new car. Accordingly, a brand new Toyota Fortuner has replaced the SUV on which our member had taken short rest, Sir.
Chairman: This is too much. It is a great insult to our community. It is high time we proceed en masse to Vidhana Soudha and lodge our protest with the CM Siddaramaiah. But where is our member who sat on the CM’s car?
Kaka: Sir. He is business-minded. Right now he is with the Toyota dealer who sold the new Fortuner to the CM. He is asking for his share of commission! After all, it was because of him that the dealer could sell the car to the CM!
Kejri: Modi is responsible! Modi is responsible!
(The meeting comes to an end)


Narain said...

Modi is responsible! Modi is responsible for AVK righting this skit!!

AVK Murthy said...

You are right, NN!