Tuesday, September 10, 2013

I Don't Know, Son! - 67

Mallya finds the culprits for Kingfisher’s failure!
Son: The Kingfisher Airlines Chairman Vijay Mallya appears to be a relieved man nowadays, dad.
Father: How come? Go on, son.
Son: It seems he formed a Task Force to find out the reasons behind the miserable failure of the once prestigious airline, dad.
Father: Go on, son.
Son: According to Mallya, the team has put the blame on everyone including engine suppliers, employees, banks and tax authorities for grounding the carrier from October 2012, dad.
Father: Go on, son.
Son: Quite surprisingly the team appears to have left out the main culprit in its blame list, dad.
Father: Who was it? Go on, son.
Son: It was Mallya himself who was silently allowing the airline to drift towards disaster by blaming the bankers who had invested the public money generously in the sinking ship, dad!
Father: I don’t know, son!
The Last Rites!
Son: Mallya has said that the airline is seriously engaged in discussions with one potential investor for raising the money, dad.
Father: For what?  Go on, son.
Son: While Mallya has not mentioned the name of this crazy investor, the sources reveal that it could be only for one purpose at this stage, dad.
Father: Like what? Go on, son.
Son: It is for performing the last rites of the company, dad!
Father: Oh! My God!  Go on, son.
Son: The presumption is the investor must be a philanthropist who believes in charitable activities just like the PSU banks who sunk the public money in the airline, dad!
Father: I don’t know, son!
Tendulkar and the Scorebook!
Son: A statement by Tendulkar seems to have given a lot of food for thought for the BCCI Selection Committee, dad.
Father: Go on, son.
Son: The legend has said that “Selection is not about looking at scorebook”, dad!
Father: So what? Go on, son.
Son: The Master batsman has scored below an average of 25 runs in his last ten test matches, dad!
Father: Go on, son.
Son: The Selection Committee is finding it difficult to interpret the statement of the legend, dad.
Father: Go on, Son.
Son: One interpretation is that the committee should not go by the recent ‘miserable’ scorecard of the legend and select him as usual, dad.
Father: And the other? Go on, son.
Son: The other interpretation is that the committee should not go by the historical earlier scorebook of the legend and drop him like any other player, dad!
Father: I don’t know, son!
The Hindu Colony!
Son: The Hindu newspaper is creating waves in certain parts of Bangalore, dad.
Father: Go on, son.
Son: The historic English newspaper from Chennai has come out with a subscription offer that is irresistible, dad.
Father: Like what? Go on, son.
Son: It has offered an annual subscription that is less than three months subscription for any Standard English newspaper, dad.
Father: Interesting. Go on, son.
Son: It is also offering a handbag as a gift for each subscription, dad.
Father: Go on, son.
Son: It is reported that people have en masse shifted to The Hindu from TOI, Deccan Herald and the New Indian Express, dad.
Father: Go on, son.
Son: So much so that our colony is now referred to as The Hindu Colony by the newspaper vendors, dad!
A V Krishnamurthy
10th September 2013


2 comments:

Narain said...

As I wait for my flight for Dubai at SFO, this has come in for very interesting reading. Noted to avail the subscriptional offer of the Hindu once I land in Bangalore. Mallya will continue to be the cartoon character forever.

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