I Don’t Know, Son! – 42

Afridi’s Brotherly Boom Boom!

Son: The dashing Pakistan cricketer Shahid Afridi is of late more in the news for wrong reasons, dad.

Father: True. Go on, son.

Son: The cricketer was returning to Pakistan after winning the Asia Cup in Dacca, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: There was a huge crowd of fans at the Karachi Airport who encircled Afridi and it is reported that Afridi’s three-year old daughter was hurt in the melee, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: The hot blooded cricketer, who of late is not among runs, suddenly lost his temper and started hitting his fans, dad!

Father: Go on, son.

Son: Gul Rehaman, who bore the brunt of the attack, told the press that he still loves Afridi and he is like his brother, dad!

Father: I don’t know, son!

Saif Ali Khan and the Library!

Son: Saif Ali Khan was recently in news for his brawl with a South African businessman during his dinner at Wasabi restaurant in Mumbai, dad.

Father: True. Go on, son.

Son: Iqbal Sharma, the South African businessman, had objected to the noise levels raised by Saif and his group of friends including Kareena Kapoor, dad.

Father: Go on, Son.

Son: The argument ended in a scuffle. But Saif says that he only asked Iqbal to go to a library if he was particular about a peaceful atmosphere, dad!

Father: Go on, son.

Son: When asked how the idea of suggesting a library came, Saif admitted that he had never visited a library, dad!

Father: Go on, son.

Son: He also said that his father legendary Mansoor Ali Khan Pataudi used to advise him to go to library, whenever he was creating nuisance at home. But he never bothered, dad!

Father: Amusing. Go on, son.

Son: He says he had only a vague idea that a library is supposed to be a peaceful place, dad!

Father: I don’t know, son!

Nothing to do with Cricket!

Son: India has voted against Sri Lanka at the UN Human Rights Commission Council, dad.

Father: True. Go on, son.

Son: A spokesperson of the External Affairs Ministry was quick to deny the charge that the decision to vote against the neighbouring country had something to do with cricket, dad!

Father: Interesting. Go on, son.

Son: It may be noted that Sri Lankan Team was instrumental in denying the entry of Indian team into the finals of both the Triangular series in Australia and then in the recent Asia Cup in Bangladesh, dad.

Father: True. Go on, son.

Son: The Indian cricket enthusiasts expected the Lankan team to lose against Australia and to win against Bangladesh, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: They did exactly the opposite, dad! They defeated the Australian team and lost against the Bangladesh team in the crucial matches, dad!

Father: I don’t know, son!

The Costly (Governor’s) Recall!

Son: Advocate Asok Pande learnt a very costly lesson in the Supreme Court recently, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: He had earlier filed a PIL with the Gujarat High Court for recall of Gujarat Governor Kamla Beniwal, dad!

Father: How come? Go on, son.

Son: The court dismissed his PIL and imposed a fine of Rs25,000 on him for wasting its time, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: Like the legendary Vikramadithya, he pursued the matter with the Supreme Court by filing a review petition, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: He argued his case for over one hour despite warnings from the SC bench, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: Fed up with his frivolous case and his endless arguments, the bench enhanced the penalty to Rs1 lakh, dad! But it did not end there, dad.

Father: Interesting. Go on, son.

Son: He continued his arguments unabated, dad! The bench then asked the security men to throw him out from the courtroom, dad!

Father: I don’t know, son!

A V Krishnamurthy

25^th March 2012

Looking Back - Episode – 3

As BGR was coming out of the City Railway station, he was besieged by the Tongawalas just like the present day Auto Rickshaw drivers. He negotiated with one of them to take him to Benne Govindappa Street in Basavanagudi for Rs2. The Tonga moved on the Goods Shed road to enter Chamrajpet and then to Basavanagudi to reach the Benne Govindappa Street. The journey was very smooth with only a few cycles on the road. While the three-wheelers had not arrived in the city, there were very few four wheelers and negligible number of two wheelers (Motorcycles). Padmanabha Rao (Mama) was staying in a small outhouse in a large site. The owner was living in a big house in the same site.

BGR found Mama sitting on a chair with a typical pensioner’s uniform (dhothi, shirt, coat and a cap) and going through the Indian Express. He welcomed BGR and asked his wife to serve him a cup of coffee. After having the coffee BGR took his bath in a small bathroom. He felt fully refreshed after removing the dirt collected on his body during the stressful train journey. By that time breakfast was ready. Just then he saw the three sons of Mama entering the house to join the breakfast. The three Bs (Bhavani Shankar, Balakrishna and Balagangadhar) were staying on the upstairs of a nearby building for want of space in their rented house! While the first son was unqualified and unemployed, the other two were studying diploma courses.

BGR did have a problem with the breakfast. Brought up in South Kanara, he was used to preparations made with coconut oil. The uppittu made with groundnut oil was almost unpalatable to him! He also found the dark coffee with low milk content difficult to drink! He somehow managed to gulp down the Uppittu and the coffee. The three Bs left the house immediately after the breakfast. Mama had retired from the Defence Department and was following the military system in his private life also. BGR observed that his wife and children were simply obeying his orders like faithful soldiers! Mami was totally afraid of Mama and it showed on her face! It appeared as if Mami was always worried that Mama may initiate disciplinary proceedings (court-martial) against her!

Mama asked BGR to go around Basavanagudi and return by 12.30 pm. As he moved out, BGR found the weather very chill and enjoyable. It was quite unlike the perspiring weather of South Kanara! The roads were lined up with large green trees and there was very little traffic. He first arrived near the famous National College. He went round the college and ate two bananas at a cost of two anas. He then located the telegraphic office and sent a telegram to Pema in Udupi confirming his safe arrival. He found the Basavanagudi locality a calm and quiet place.

BGR returned home at 12.30 pm. Mama ordered lunch exactly at 1 pm. After the lunch Mama told him about his service in the Defence Department including his posting in the city of Karachi. He had come back to Bangalore only at the fag end of his career. It was a long story told over several cups of coffee and good number of beedies! Mama appeared to be a lover of both nicotine and caffeine! The story of the pre-independence British era was no doubt very interesting and absorbing. But the smoke emanating from beedies made the environment quite unfriendly! BGR felt relieved when he was again ordered to go round Basavanagudi in the evening!

BGR was soon near a large green beautiful park. He was told that it was called M N Krishna Rao Park. He went round and sat on a bench. He felt totally refreshed. As he was recollecting the events of the day, he could make out why Mami was preparing coffee with very low milk content. Mama’s military budget should have restricted the milk supply at home. She had to manage with the same quantity for several cups for his consumption. Even though the house was located in the Benne (butter) Govindappa Street, there was scarcity of milk at home! But Mami could never complain. Understandably Mama had his limitations – even after his retirement his sons were not employed and he had no house of his own. The  pension amount had to take care of the entire family needs including house rent.

As BGR was coming out of the park he saw a board of the Indian Institute of World Culture. He was soon back at home. Exactly at 8 pm Mama ordered Mami to serve the dinner. After dinner BGR was ordered to go to bed so that he could get up early in the morning to explore the nearest route to Canara Bank Administrative Office. The first day of BGR in the Garden City had come to an end.

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The next morning (3rd February 1959) BGR was supposed to take up a trial journey to Canara Bank Administrative Office (AO) as per the schedule drawn by Pema. He got up early and finished his breakfast. Mama was going through the Indian Express and gave him some tips on how to attend the interview. As per him it was important to remember the names of the Chief Minister and the Finance Minister. He also briefed BGR about the importance of Vidhana Soudha and how it was built by the earlier Chief Minister Kengal Hanumanthaiah.

Mama also gave directions to BGR as to how he was to reach the Canara Bank AO. He had the option to catch a BTS bus route NO.11 or walk the entire distance which was only two kms. BGR opted to walk and started his journey at 9.30 am. He reached Minerva Circle via National High School Circle and  V V Puram Circle.  After Minerva Circle, while walking on JC Road, half-way he saw Bharath Talkies on the right side and after about 300 yards, Shivaji Talkies on the left side. (Presently SBI building is situated in place of Bharath Talkies and the statue of Shivaji alone is existing in the place of Shivaji Talkies). He was soon near the Town hall. At Town Hall he took a left turn and entered the Silver Jubilee Park Road after crossing Narasimharaja Road. He could now see the Shoukath Building built with dressed granite stone with a big hoarding of Murphy Radio. It was a ground+3 floor building with the Canara Bank AO occupying the 2^nd and 3^rd floors. The bank boards were displayed very prominently.

Having completed the four-km pilot journey, BGR was back at Mama’s house by the afternoon. Mama was pleased to know that BGR could locate the office independently. After the lunch BGR made some preparations for the interview by going through the notes he had prepared in Udupi. In the evening he again went out and walked up to Lalbhag West Gate. Before going to bed in the night after dinner he kept all the documents ready. He was totally prepared now for the first interview of his career.

------- (To be continued)

A V Krishnamurthy

23rd March 2012

I Don’t Know, Son! – 41

The Biggest Fish’s Smallest Claim!

Son: The Karnataka Lokayukta headed by Justice Santosh Hegde had conducted a search and seizure of the properties of the IPS Officer Hemanth Nimbalkar in 2009, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: At that time the Lokayukta had claimed that Nimbalkar was their biggest fish yet, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: It was even claimed that the IPS Officer had amassed assets in excess of Rs250 crore, dad!

Father: Go on, son.

Son: Recently the Lokayukta has filed a ‘B Report’ stating that it does not have any evidence against the former SP, dad!

Father: Go on, son.

Son: The apparently innocent IPS Officer has now filed a defamation case against Santosh Hegde, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: The supposed to be Biggest Fish has made the smallest claim, dad. He has sought a compensation of Re1 from Hegde, dad!

Shahid Kapoor’s School of Affairs!

Son: The popular and young Bollywood actor Shahid Kapoor is a confused man nowadays, dad.

Father: How come? Go on, son.

Son: He had a long running affair with the young and popular actress Kareena Kapoor. But she deserted him and went with the divorced senior actor Saif Ali Khan, dad!

Father: Go on, son.

Son: Shahid then had a long-time affair with another young and popular actress Priyanka Chopra, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: But she has now deserted him. There are strong rumours that she is having an affair with the married and middle aged senior actor Shah Rukh Khan, dad.

Father: Amusing! Go on, Son.

Son: But Shahid is not amused, dad. He says he is getting a feeling that he is running a School of Affairs for the young actresses to run away with the senior stars, dad!

Father: I don’t know, son!

Income Fictitious - but Tax Real!

Son: Mahindra Satyam has managed to secure a stay order from the Andhra Pradesh High Court against the attachment order of Income Tax Department attaching land and buildings of the company, dad.

Father: True. Go on, son.

Son: The IT Department had raised a demand for Rs617-crore tax against the company for the years 2003-04 to 2008-09 when the company was run by the tainted Ramalinga Raju and his team, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: The current management of the company had pleaded with the IT dept. that the major portion of the income declared for the years was fictitious as has been investigated by the CBI team, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: But the IT Department is not relenting, dad. It insists that the income may be fictitious, but the tax is for real, dad!

Father: I don’t know, son!

The Number One University!

Son: The Visvesvaraya technological University (VTU) of Karnataka has performed exceedingly well, dad.

Father: In what field? Go on, son.

Son: I am not talking about the academic performance. I am referring to the financial performance, dad!

Father: How come? Go on, son.

Son: VTU’s excellent financial performance has attracted the IT Department, which has slapped a tax demand notice for Rs220 crore, dad!

Father: Go on, son.

Son: Although the University is exempted from IT as a non-profit organization, the department has found some provision in the IT Act to demand tax - in its target-oriented approach to tax collection, dad!

Father: Go on, son.

Son: But the vice-chancellor is not amused, dad. He has challenged the demand in the High Court, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: VTU will have the distinction as the First University in India to pay the income tax if ultimately it is made to pay the tax, dad!

Father: I don’t know, son!

A V Krishnamurthy

17^th March 2012

Looking Back - Episode – 2

BGR was undertaking such a long journey on bus for the first time in his life. Even though he had to change to a mini-bus at Someshwar and an ordinary bus again at Agumbe, he had purchased a direct ticket to Shimoga (called through ticket) that was to be exchanged at both the places. The private bus companies had this special arrangement and one had to make payment for the entire journey only at the starting point.

The bus was passing through small towns of the South Kanara district including Manipal, Hiriyadka, Perdoor and Hebri. BGR suddenly became conscious that he was alone. It was for the first time that he was travelling without the company of his elders. He knew he had become independent and had to take all decisions on his own hereafter. He would start earning his salary and had to manage his finances once the appointment was made at the bank. A new vista was opening in the life of the 18-year old young man. In those days there were no dream jobs. For most of the young men the job was only a dream!  The bank job was indeed a coveted one. Was he lucky?

After leaving Hebri behind, the bus passed through a road that was covered by virgin forest on both sides. BGR could also see the beautiful Seetha River flowing on the left side of the road. He saw the immense beauty of nature which was simply marvelous. As the bus was approaching Someshwar, the tall Western Ghats appeared on one side. BGR got down at the place and got ready to get into the mini-bus. But he found a large crowd of passengers and total chaos prevailing. Just then he saw a mini-bus arriving from Agumbe. It had a maximum capacity of carrying 18-20 passengers. The whole crowd simply rushed towards the bus. But they had to first exchange their tickets with the agent and there was no queue! It was just pandemonium and only might appeared to be right!

BGR could not take the risk of joining the mob in view of the trunk he was carrying, that too with the money. He waited for the next bus to arrive. Fortunately the next bus arrived after some time and he managed to get in. But he was asked to keep his trunk on the bus top! Somehow he managed to place it on the top and got back.

The bus started its journey and soon it reached the point from where the famous U-turns of the Agumbe Ghat started. The driver was a master who could negotiate the curves with ease. At the end of each U-turn BGR found the temperature falling proportionately! The climate was slowly changing from the humid and hot South Kanara weather to the pleasant Malnad weather! While BGR was appreciating the comfort of the ideal weather he suddenly remembered that his trunk was on the bus top! He realised that the trunk must have been moving here and there as the bus was taking steep turns! As the trunk was made of hard steel, there was no possibility of damage. However, BGR could only hope that it would not fall down from the top and slip into the steep Western Ghats!

Soon the bus reached Agumbe, the Chirapunji of the South. Agumbe was a junction for people traveling to and from Sringeri, Koppa, Kalasa, Thirthahalli, Shimoga and South Kanara.  The passengers arriving from South Kanara on mini-busses had to change to ordinary busses while those travelling to the coastal places had to get into the mini-busses. BGR found a large crowd of passengers at the bus stand. There was a well known temple of GopalaKrishna in the town. Many families from Malnad used to conduct marriage and Upanayanam ceremonies at the temple (My eldest sister’s marriage was held here in 1954). The Sunset view from Agumbe was very famous. One could see the beautiful view of the sun disappearing in the deep Arabian Sea in the evening from a vantage point on the Ghat.

By the seventies busses started plying directly to Bangalore from Udupi and Mangalore via Shiradi Ghat. Busses from Kundapura started plying via Hulikal Ghat. Also larger mini-busses from South Kanara started running directly from Mangalore/Udupi/Kundapura to Shimoga through Agumbe. The coastal highway from Mangalore to Mumbai made people travel directly to Mumbai. The traffic via Agumbe declined. The necessity to change the busses at Someshwar and Agumbe was no more there. Agumbe lost its importance and turned into a sleepy village.

The sleepy village turned into the famous Malgudi town of R K Narayan in the year 1986. It was late Shankar Nag, the well known Kannada actor and director, who shot the entire TV serial Malgudi Days here. The town got lot of hype in those days and almost gained back its glory. But post Malgudi Days the town went back to sleep once again! It even lost the Chirapunji of the South status to Hulikal, adding insult to the injury! The only consolation was – the very existence of its counterpart Someshwar in South Kanara was totally forgotten!

BGR took his breakfast at the bus stand hotel and got into the Shimoga bus. Soon the bus arrived at Thirthahalli, also called the Parashurama Kshetra. Legend has it that the sage Parashurama could wash away the blood stain on his axe in the sacred Tunga River flowing here. He had chopped off the head of his mother Renuka with the axe at the instance of his father, the great sage Jamadagni! The holy River is known to wash away the sins of all those who take a dip here. An annual festival called Yellamavasye Jaatre is held here in the month of December.

The road from Thirthahalli to Shimoga virtually follows the course of the River Tunga. The bus passed through a place called Gajanoor. Here a mini-dam has been built across the river. An 8-km concrete road from here led the bus to Shimoga. The entire route from Thirthahalli to Shimoga was covered with dense typical Malnad forest.

BGR hired a Tonga from the bus stand to reach the famous Brindavan Hotel on the Bal Raj Urs Road by about 1.30 pm. This hotel was the transit point for the travelers from South Kanara district to Bangalore and Mumbai. A special arrangement was available to keep the luggage so that one could go round the city till it was time to depart. After taking his lunch costing four anas (25 paise), BGR went around Nehru Road. He found the culture and the language of Malnad totally different from that of South Kanara. He later left the hotel at 6 pm to reach the railway station 2 kms away. The ticket to Bangalore was available at Rs5 and 4 anas. The train arrived by 7.30 pm.

There was total chaos on the platform as a large crowd of passengers rushed towards the compartments. Most of them were traveling only up to Birur, Arsikere and Tumkur. BGR could not even sit properly. The compartments were unclean and dirty.  The smoke from the steam engine added to the misery. The journey through the night turned out to be quite forgettable! There was great relief when the train ultimately arrived at the garden city in the early morning at 6.30 am.

------- (To be continued)

A V Krishnamurthy

15^th March 2012

Looking Back

Episode – 1

The Prelude

B Govinda Rao (popularly known as BGR) was my mentor when I joined Canara Bank in Shimoga way back in 1970. Those were the days when we all thought that there was nothing in life to achieve once you got an employment. The scope for our promotion appeared to be very bleak and we thought it fit to spend our spare time in mostly seeing all kinds of films!

BGR had arrived from Bangalore on his promotion as officer. He was a man who appeared to be in a hurry and restless all the time! He had passed his CAIIB examination as a matriculate. He could not really understand how young graduates like us were not even prepared to make an attempt! He took it upon himself to make us career oriented by first asking us to appear for the CAIIB examination.

With his encouragement we came out successful in the CAIIB examination and the promotion followed. We never looked back! All of us owe our successful career in Canara Bank to our beloved BGR. He has been a pillar of strength to us and remains so even after our retirement.

I have been thinking of writing a small biography of BGR since long. In fact I felt my writing skills were not worth if I could not complete this self-imposed assignment! BGR was kind enough to provide me the material. I will be covering only the career portion of BGR’s life, which began and ended in Canara Bank. The story starts unfolding in the year 1959:

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The Bailakare family of Puttannayya-Lakshmi couple at Udupi comprised five sons and three daughters. It was basically an agricultural family with cultivable land of around three acres. The family also had a coconut garden of 20 cents in which the ancestral house was situated. B Govinda Rao (BGR) was born as the third son of the family. BGR passed his SSLC in 1956 through the Secondary School Board of the erstwhile Madras State. South Kanara district was attached to the Madras State at that time. It came under the Mysore State only later in the same year. Being a minor, BGR was not eligible for government and bank jobs till he attained majority in December 1958. So he engaged himself in assisting his father in his agricultural activities. Simultaneously he joined typewriting classes and completed the junior examination with a speed of 65 words per minute.

BGR’s uncle, popularly known as Pema, was the man who initiated the process that ended with his appointment in Canara Bank. Pema had a friend called M R Pai who was a retired Telegraph official, well known in his community and who had close contacts with the top executives of Canara Bank. M R Pai, through his good offices, helped BGR to appear for a written test at the Udupi branch of the bank. BGR performed well in the test and was called for an interview at the Administrative Office of the bank at Bangalore on 4th February 1959. As for the information gathered by M R Pai, those who passed the test were sure to get the appointment and the interview was more or less a formality. Thus it was almost a celebration time for BGR and his family.

Now it was the question of travelling all the way to Bangalore. Unlike today, when even traveling to US is taken as an ordinary short-time journey by air, traveling to Bangalore was not a simple affair in those days. In fact BGR was the first person in his family to undertake a visit to the state capital! There were no direct busses to Bangalore as they could not pass through the narrow and zigzag roads in the Western Ghats. The people from the South Kanara district had to first travel to a place called Someshwar that is located at the feet of the Western Ghats. A narrow road from there through the Ghats would lead to Agumbe (known as the Chirapunji of the South) on the top of the Ghats. This portion of the 13-km journey was to be undertaken on a mini-bus (called taxi in those days). From Agumbe one had to travel to Shimoga by bus via Thirthahalli. The journey from Shimoga was to be undertaken on train that would start at 8 pm in the night.

It was apparent that BGR had to set up his establishment in Bangalore once he secured the appointment after his interview. It made him to go on a purchasing spree! The purchases included a steel trunk with a Godrej lock, a bed roll with a pillow and two bed sheets. The other purchases were two banyans, two white mundus and a pair of chappals. Additionally, the family tailor was ordered to stitch a pair each of pyjamas and shirts. Wearing of pants had not been thought of for ordinary folks in those days - at least in South Kanara! The concept was introduced much later and appeared to be quite fashionable at that time!

Simultaneously BGR also started preparing for the interview. Again it was M R Pai and another friend of Pema, Professor U L Achar, who came to his rescue. The first question to be put to him by the pair was – ‘who was the Prime Minister of India’? BGR responded by telling the name of Jawaharlal Nehru. But the pair appeared to be unimpressed! BGR could not make out what was wrong with his answer! He was told to give the answer in a full sentence as - “Shri Jawaharlal Nehru is the Prime Minister of India”. He was also told to be free and frank during the interview. He was to reply in the affirmative if he was asked whether he was prepared to work anywhere in India! Another advice was to go through the daily English newspaper to keep him up-to-date with the current events.

Another issue cropped up at this stage. It was the question of stay in Bangalore till the appointment was confirmed. Fortunately a distant relative from the side of BGR’s eldest brother’s in-laws landed at their residence just in time. Mr. Padmanabha Rao was a retired official from the Accounts Department (Defence) who had settled down in Bangalore. He asked BGR to come straight to his home at Benne Govindappa Street in Basavanagudi. Needless to say BGR’s parents were much relieved to hear this arrangement.

Pema chalked out a perfect schedule for BGR to attend the interview on 4^th February 1959. He was to leave Udupi in the morning of 1^st February, reach Bangalore on 2^nd early morning and take full day’s rest. A pilot journey to the administrative office of Canara Bank was to be undertaken on the 3^rd. He was expected to perfectly remember the shortest route and was to travel by the same route on the 4^th to reach the bank by 9.30 am for the interview.

The D day arrived early. On the morning of 1^st February 1959, BGR left Udupi on the Shankar Vittal bus. The journey had started with Rs100 cash given by his beloved mother. As a matter of abundant precaution, BGR had kept Rs80 in the trunk under lock and key and only Rs20 in his purse. As he bid adieu to his family he turned emotional. But little did he know at that time - he was leaving behind his beloved family for the start of a career in the bank that lasted for forty two years!

------- (To be continued)

A V Krishnamurthy

10^th March 2012

I Don’t Know, Son! - 40

The Bunch of Jokers!

Son: Mohinder Amarnath had once called the BCCI Selection Committee as a bunch of jokers, dad.

Father: True. Go on, son.

Son: The present committee headed by K Srikkanth really felt itself like a bunch of jokers recently, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: The Committee was discussing about the ‘resting’ of senior cricketers including Sachin and Sehwag for the Asia Cup, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: Srikkanth was already under pressure as Gavaskar had issued a statement stating that he could talk to Sachin personally to persuade him to retire from one-day cricket, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: Just then his mobile started ringing and he saw it was Sachin himself calling him. He immediately concluded that Sachin was announcing his retirement and felt fully relieved, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: The conversation went like follows, dad.

Sachin: Hello Srikkanth Sir!

Sri: Hello Sachin. I knew you would not put me in an embarrassing position by forcing me to ask you to quit! Blah… Blah… Blah…

Sachin: But Sir…

Sri: I understand your predicament Sachin. You are close to scoring your 100^th century and it is difficult for you to quit at this stage. But…..Blah…Blah… Blah…

Sachin: But sir….

Sri: I definitely can make out Kanna…..I mean Sachin. You are really great Sachin. I know scoring 99 centuries is itself a record that no one could ever beat! Blah… Blah…. Blah….

Sachin:  But sir….

Sri: Don’t worry Sachin. I will tell Sunil (Gavaskar) that you saved my day by voluntarily announcing your retirement in the interest of youngsters. Blah…Blah….Blah….

 Sachin: (At the top of his voice). But Sir - I rang you up only to tell you that I am ‘available’ for the Asia Cup! You may include my name as usual, sir!

Sri: Oh! What? I understand Sachin! We should allow you to score your 100^th century! Let us make your selection mandatory! It is so important from the national perspective also! Blah… Blah… Blah...

Son: The dialogue ended there and the committee decided to include Sachin’s name as usual, dad!

Father: I don’t know, son!

Tendulkar’s Win-Win Situation!

Son: As far as retirement is concerned, Sachin is said to be taking it as purely a business decision, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: His elder brother and business manager Ajit is said to have advised him to continue playing without minding advices to retire from anybody, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: As per Ajit, Sachin’s brand value will nosedive the moment he retires from cricket including one-day matches, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: Ajit is 100% sure that the selection committee dare not exclude him from the team till he scores his 100^th century, dad.

Father: Go on, Son.

Son: Ajit says he will jack up Sachin’s brand price the moment he scores his 100^th century, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: In case he continues to fail scoring the coveted century, Ajit hopes to maintain the brand value at the same level, dad!

Father: I don’t know, son!

Tendulkar’s No-Win Situation!

Son: While commercially Sachin is in a Win-Win situation, as far as the game is concerned, he appears to be in a No-Win situation, dad.

Father: How come? Go on, son.

Son: If he scores his 100th century in the Asia Cup, that too against Bangladesh, it would be on record that he could achieve the milestone only against a lowly rated team in a sub-continental pitch, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: On the other hand if he fails again, the people will say he could not score the much awaited century even against a weak team like Bangladesh, dad!

Father: I don’t know, son!

Rohit Sharma follows his Heroes Literally!

Son: It seems the young and upcoming cricketer Rohit Sharma had been advised by his well wishers to follow the footsteps of his childhood heroes like Sachin, Rahul Dravid and Laxman, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: Rohit was made to sit in the pavilion during the matches of the current test series in Australia, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: He was closely observing the way Rahul, Laxman and Sachin were playing the matches, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: He found that all the three made it a point to get out mostly before their score touched two digits by playing some silly strokes, dad!

Father: Go on, son.

Son: Rohit got his chance in the one-day series which started immediately after the test series, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: He was accommodated by resting seniors including Sachin, Sehwag and Gambhir, dad.

Father: Go on, son.

Son: He literally followed his childhood heroes by getting out for low scores by playing silly strokes carelessly, dad!

Father: Go on, son.

Son: He did this so consistently that the team management abandoned its rotation policy in the end and made him sit in the pavilion, dad!

Father: I don’t know, son!

A V Krishnamurthy

5^th March 2012